5 Healthy Characteristics of Anger

Accepting AngerIn a society where opposition paralyzes our government, mass killings continue to increase and TV talk show hosts spew sarcasm and obscenities across the airwaves, our culture readily labels anger as undesirable, bad and even destructive. Not true.


Anger on its own merits is a wonderful, healthy gift!

A normal emotion, anger is a feeling in response to fear or to being hurt. The feeling is not the problem. Rather, the anger-related behavior can become a problem. At Anger Alternatives, we teach participants to separate feelings from behavior as a first step toward accepting, interpreting and redirecting anger.

An educational program built upon The Medol Model, Anger Alternatives teaches the tools and skills inherent in the following five characteristics of anger.

Anger informs.
Listening to your personal anger signals informs you that you are hurt and you don’t want to be hurt. Your physical reactions such as a knotted stomach or tense shoulders inform you of situations that simply don’t work for you. When you learn to listen to these signals, you gain the personal power to make healthy choices in difficult situations.

Anger speaks.
Anger is your flashing yellow light. It tells you to proceed with caution or stop. When you learn to recognize and honor your signals, you can create new habits.

Anger sets boundaries.
Becoming clear about your tolerance for risk and vulnerability allows you to decide when it is okay – or not okay – to let others come close. As you become comfortable with anger, you begin to develop natural insights to define your limits and boundaries.

Anger identifies the want.
Anger tells you immediately what you do NOT want. The opposite of what you do not want is what you DO want. It’s really that simple.

Anger provides opportunity.
All behavior is learned, and therefore can be unlearned. Anger is no different. Everyone can learn skills to redirect anger and create opportunities for personal growth and respect-based relationships.

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