Recommended Reading

Iron John: A Book About Men

Bly, Robert. Addison-Wesley, 1990 (reprint edition, 2004)

This is the classic book  that is the bible of the American men’s movement. Written in prose and poetry with clear applications of classical archetypes, this is a story of a boy guided by his spirit-based mentor in their path to initiate the boy in guiding through and heal his culturally created wounds.

A Little Book on the Human Shadow

Bly, Robert. Harper & Row 1998.

An excellent introduction to Jungian “shadow” work. Shadow is that part of our psyche that is unknown to us. These are the unspoken connections we have to emotion and experiences we don’t know how to measure or recognize because they operate unseen within us. This book gives appropriate and clear vocabulary and insight to our emotional inner workings and it is highly recommended for both men and women.

Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ

Goleman, Daniel. Bantam Books, 1995

This bestseller is a  true yardstick that relates to and empowers our intellectual and emotional lives. Goleman addresses how EI measures experience. As children and adults in today’s world, too often we learn to “understand” and make the world rational instead of to “feel” and to “accept” and “interpret” life. This book identifies the  path to our discovering and developing sensory-based feelings in our lives and developing a personal vocabulary that expresses those feelings.

Facing Shame: Families in Recovery

Fossom, Merle A,, Mason, Marilyn J. N.P. W.W. Norton & Company Ltd. 1989

In its fourth printing, this book was originally written as a college text. It is one of the best sources to deconstruct shame. Amongst technical psychological verbiage that I encourage clients to bypass, are excellent case histories that are analyzed in ways that reveal the true nature and depth of family shame patterns in clear and simple language. Shame, which is institutionalized disrespect, is in our families, our work, and in everyday life. It can be emotionally crippling, and it has to be recognized before it can be addressed.

Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples, 20th Anniversary Edition

Hendrix, Harville, and Helen LaKelly Hunt. Henry Holt & Co; Revised and Updated edition (December 26, 2007)

Excellent manual for healing and finding healthy love.

The Hazards of Being Male: Surviving the Myth of Masculine Privilege

Goldberg, Herb. Iconoclassics; 2009 Revised Edition

Originally written as the male response to feminism’s claim that oppression was for women only, this book was first popular among female readers for their male partners and has endured for 30 years. It speaks to how males in the American culture will not change in any meaningful way until he experiences his underlying rage towards the endless, impossible binds under which he lives, the rigid definition of his role, the endless pressure to be all things to all people, and the guilt-oriented, self-denying way he has traditionally related to women, to his feelings, and to his needs.

Classic “Mens’s Rights” bible.  Major expression of anger and defense of men.

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom (A Toltec Wisdom Book)

Ruiz, Miguel. Amber-Allen, 1997.

Classic in its own time. Excellent direction for simplification and personal power.

The Myth of Male Power

Farrell, Warren. Simon & Shuster 1993.

Classic analysis of mistaken cultural assumptions about men and their role in cociety.

The Road Less Traveled, Timeless Edition: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth

Peck, Scott M. Touchstone; Anniversary Edition edition  2003

The classic on finding the path in life that serves both men and women.

Your Perfect Right: Assertiveness and Equality in Your Life and Relationships (9th Edition)

Alberti, Robert E., and Michael L. Emmons.  Impact Publishers, 9th edition, 2008.

Explanation, illustration and development of the power in assertiveness.