Accept
- Accept the anger feelings in yourself and in others.
- Validate the feelings.
- Separate the feelings from the behavior. It is the anger related behavior, not the anger feeling, that presents the problem.
- It’s OK to be angry.
Interpret
- Identify your signs and signals, Road, Body and Mind Signs
- Listen to the message in the anger feelings
- Ask “What is not OK.”
- Ask “What do I want?”
- Look at the wound and the loss, not at the symptoms
Re-direct
- Stay in your power; don’t let your emotions control your behavior
- De-escalation tools:
- notice your signals
- back off
- breathe
- ask what is not OK?
- ask what do I want?
- accept that I only have control of myself, I have no control over anyone or anything else.
- Effective communication skill:
- validate the feelings, yours and others
- listen
- be empathetic
- identify and address the true need
- use “I” statements
